The Touch Of A Hand

Posted by Jody Romero in HandPrints Stories & Videos | 1 comment

© Jody Lynn Romero

Laido had a strange sense of humor and a peculiar habit of hugging people. He hugged the general contractor, the subcontractors and even the clients! With my German background, touching was limited and as the only woman on the job, it was also, absolutely off limits. This 6 foot, 210 pound giant of a man, with a shaved head and two curved earrings in his left ear looked like the spitting image of Mr. Clean. I, in contrast, stood only 5 foot, 1 inch tall and 110 pounds. His tough exterior housed a warmth and softness I had not known before. My heart, on the other hand, was fiercely protected by iron bars and armed guards on the ready to shoot down anyone or anything that attempted to come near its fragile core.

As a 33 year old single mom, I lived alone with three small boys, struggling to patch our broken hearts together with the hope of better days. I operated my small Jill of all Trades business, attended school and struggled to raise happy, healthy, young men. Depression and anger seemed to be lurking around every corner. I fought the dark enemy with a resolved cry of “CAN!” into my bathroom mirror daily. I was becoming an expert at “pulling up my boot straps”, although it was becoming more and more difficult to convince myself that life would get easier and I would find my happiness again.

Bouncing down the mountain roads in Laido’s Ford Excursion to the next job, Laido turned to me and said, “I believe God put us together for a reason. Maybe it is friendship, maybe it’s so you can help me with my school, or maybe it is for something more.”

I had lost nearly all my love for a God I did not understand. I claimed to believe a God did exist, just not one that gave a damn. To which I bitterly replied, “Oh yeah? Well, you can wish in one hand and crap in the other and see which one fills up faster!”

Laido gazed at me with cautious resolve and tried again. “Can I just touch your hand?”

My eyes filled with fear and reproach, but as I turned to him, his face was filled with love and concern and I begrudgingly agreed. The touch of this gentle giant coursed a loving energy through me which was real and true.

He said softly with tears in his eyes, “You just need somebody to love you and I can love you.”

A small crack appeared in my armor while tears rose inside me. I feared the chance that love was real and tangible. I had been so hard for so long, but maybe, just maybe he could love me.

In the months that followed that fateful day, the firing squad around my heart was slowly dismissed one by one. I experienced a love and friendship that set me soaring. Not only me, but my three precious boys had a man to love them like they had not known in their little lives. One step at a time, with love as my protection, I stepped out of my prison of fear and into the joy of life.

Now, nearly four years later, we have overcome many tribulations with ourselves, our children, our finances and our spirituality. Slowly we climb together bettering ourselves with every step to fill our every cell with love and light. We have been blessed with Alaya, a new little angel, that is the glue to our family and reminds us of the love and hope that each of us holds inside ourselves. The journey, although arduous, has been more rewarding than I ever could have imagined and we are taking our dreams and making them a reality.

Photo Man’s Hand by Bernie in Cleveland Ohio
Photo Broken Heart by keparnto